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Saturday Night Racer >> SNR LOUNGE >> Send Prior Service Vets over 60
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Message started by Doug_Riparetti on 06/17/08 at 4:27pm

Title: Send Prior Service Vets over 60
Post by Doug_Riparetti on 06/17/08 at 4:27pm

I got this from another site

I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. (You can't be older than 42 to join the military.

They've got the whole thing backwards. Instead of sending 18-year-olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.

For starters: Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on killing the enemy.

Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. "My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry!" We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some not a very nice person that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while

An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10 a.m

Old guys always get up early to pee so what the hell. Besides, like I said, "I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical son-of-a-b###h raghead.

If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser

Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we like soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.

They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I can hear the Drill Sgt. now, "Get down and give me ... er ... one."

Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet.

An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, to start up a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head, and his pants were made to cover the crack of his ass. These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.

Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten raghead cowards who attacked us on September 11. The last thing an enemy would want to see right now is a couple of million pissed off old Vets with attitudes and automatic weapons who know that their best years are already behind them.

If nothing else, put us on the border and we will have it secured the first night and every night thereafter. Everybody would be asking the same question: who are those guys?

Share this with your senior friends.

Just be sure to send it in big type so they can read it.

Title: Re: Send Prior Service Vets over 60
Post by mudslinger47 on 06/17/08 at 5:19pm

Can I get an AMEN in this corner!!! Good one Doug! Duane

Title: Re: Send Prior Service Vets over 60
Post by dscEvents on 06/17/08 at 9:06pm

Hey Duane,

I'll go if you go with me! I'm not getting up early to pee yet, but I'll manage! lol!

Dave C

Title: Re: Send Prior Service Vets over 60
Post by mudslinger47 on 06/17/08 at 10:00pm

Hey, me either, (peeing that is) but I only got one shot gun!!! Duane